I've clearly taken a blow to the head during my nap, because I feel inspired (stupid?) enough to tackle this gigantic topic right now.
This year has not been kind to all. Three of my best ladies are still sifting through the ashes of their recently departed commitments; and although it serves as a cold reminder of how fleeting some life experiences are, it also turned my attention to what good vs bad love should be.
Healthy partners are not only witnesses to our stories and who we truly are. Romantic partners aren't necessary for our daily adventures either - there are plenty of companions to choose from when you have family and/or friends. Hell! I don't even believe that soul mates are meant to be our love mates too.
So why go through the pain of love at all? For those who find it difficult to pique physical interest, is it sex? Does the prospect to have someone around to do stuff with when everyone else is busy entice us into this ultimate heart trap? Maybe we can easily accept being alone, but loneliness kicks our asses each and every time.
I haven't figured it out either. I have, however, learnt this in the past 30 years:
1. Jealousy is not love.
2. If you can't celebrate my successes with me, you're not man/woman enough to be allowed a front seat to my pain.
3. Violence is not OK. Ever.
4. Neither is verbal or emotional abuse.
5. Families and friends form part of the package deal.
6. Laughter is very important in a relationship. Maybe even more so than sex.
7. What you look like does not relationship material make.
8. Every relationship is different and should not be modelled after others.
9. You are irrevocably changed by each and every relationship you have.
10. Everyone deserves exactly the kind of love they desire; but it cannot be forcibly attained.
P.S. Maybe I've watched way too many romantic movies today.