Writing It Randomly

Most of us who struggle with our weight know exactly what to do. I have all the resources I need to get my body on track to reach those #hikegoals I set for myself  last year . Instead, I've crawled back into the old habit of damaging this body the good Lord gave me. I've fallen off the #healthspo wagon and can't get up. How can someone who's such a hard worker be so pathetic at nurturing relationships and living life? My Boot Camp participation wasn't what it could've been during the second round. Social fun feels like a myth. Mornings, breakfasts, and meals in general, have gone to hell in a handbasket. Tomorrow is the 1st day of quitting sugar AGAIN. I'm shitting bricks! Are there others out there trying and failing like this over and over and over? "I am made for more than a vicious cycle of eating, gaining, stressing..." - Lysa TerKeurst I'm still hanging onto the straps, but I don't know how to make my arms pull me up and o...

And, having listened to the entire song, I think that light sometimes feel like oncoming traffic. The Smiths - weird, sad and beautiful.

The ghoulies must have been working overtime this year. On the last Thursday before Halloween, I was overcome by a strange masochistic urge to -  gasp!  -  weigh  myself. It was horrific. I've had a faint idea of how high my number must be for some time, but as I stood on that scale, it felt as if those three red numbers seared themselves into my brain. I tried to convince myself that it was a good thing to know and understand even the hard facts (knowledge is power and all that). My true self was not having any of that mind-over-matter bullshit and my mental defenses soon crumbled. I moped around whilst biting back the tears. Crying about my weight felt like a right I had not earned. If you don't vote, you can't complain. So where exactly could I go with all my weighty woes? First,  I prayed . Then, I could not stop talking about it. Oh boy! I kept yapping on and on to anybody who'd listen (or failed to flee the line of fire fast en...

Mentioning Halloween without mentioning Halloween  is just not possible. The film crowned Jamie Lee Curtis as The Scream Queen  and so far no one has knocked her off her pedestal yet. To me she is as synonymous to October as  that striped sweater or those masks . I get such a rush watching horror movies. Don't you?

Here's to everyone dealing with difficulties in their lives, but ESPECIALLY to our Breast Cancer fighters & survivors. You're an inspiration.

You won't know for sure how strong you are, until you find yourself 'Smack-Bang!' right in the midst of troubling times.

PC: QuotesArea A bad day is not a one-size-fits-all garment. No one's feelings rate higher than another's. Bad days are bad days. Grief is grief. That's it. Having said that, though, I do find that reminding myself of the fact that there are people who would love my bad days helps. It brings a different perspective to the situation. Maybe my bad day feels just as awful as someone else's bad day, but it doesn't deserve more recognition than that. It's just a bad day.

Suffering from depression is like stumbling around in familiar territory. Just as you catch a glimpse of an exit, you take a wrong turn and 'round and 'round you go. In her teaching on Deuteronomy 2 'Turning North' Lysa TerKeurst highlighted that "He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear" [ 1 Cor 10:13] . I find enormous comfort in this revelation. After their exodus from Egypt, the Israelites found themselves wandering the desert for 40 years. They must've felt hopelessly lost most of the time, but God always gives you a way out. For them, it was Moses. For me, there are numerous healthier options. Dakhla Lighthouse, Western Sahara [PC: JB Dodane]

Mostly, I just slept. (It was a severe bout of Hangover Anxiety.) Now, now! Before you start saying that I'm making light of a serious mental health issue - I'm not joking. It's a real thing . You can deny it all you want, but the D&A* Brain just doesn't like alcohol as much as we do. It was only after my terrible week that I connected the dots. As you can see, I'm back on the blog, but I felt that I had to share my latest experience with those of you who don't really understand what it's like for people like us. Managing my mental health is easier these days (on medication), but that does not mean the dark pit has disappeared. It happens less frequently, but sometimes I turn a corner and fall right in. I miss all the signs, and until last week I never fully understood the havoc partying can wreck on my navigation. During my teens, I was drinking regularly so there was never a real opportunity for me to experience the lasting effects. Before I...