Hiatus Report
For an introvert like me, disconnection is nearly as important as connecting.
Not that my internet hiatus was purposefully planned. They never are. They just happen, and before I realise it, weeks have gone by without a single post.
I have come to the realisation that I pull myself inwards for a spiritual breather whenever there's a lot going on, or when I get overwhelmed.
You see, living with anxiety is almost like being constantly baked. You have all these things you want/need to say (or do), but they get blocked in by paranoia (or severe lethargy). By the time you finally decided on how you want to express yourself, it feels like you've missed your moment, or that the topic is no longer relevant. [This vicious cycle is very similar to the one in which you feel fat, then overeat to silence those feelings, which makes you feel fat...etcetera.]
The Bad News is that I still haven't figured out how to break the cycle every time I find myself trapped in it, but the Good News is that I haven't given up on trying. Everyone has a light that needs to shine on the world, I just have to replace the batteries in mine from time to time.
Not that my internet hiatus was purposefully planned. They never are. They just happen, and before I realise it, weeks have gone by without a single post.
I have come to the realisation that I pull myself inwards for a spiritual breather whenever there's a lot going on, or when I get overwhelmed.
You see, living with anxiety is almost like being constantly baked. You have all these things you want/need to say (or do), but they get blocked in by paranoia (or severe lethargy). By the time you finally decided on how you want to express yourself, it feels like you've missed your moment, or that the topic is no longer relevant. [This vicious cycle is very similar to the one in which you feel fat, then overeat to silence those feelings, which makes you feel fat...etcetera.]
The Bad News is that I still haven't figured out how to break the cycle every time I find myself trapped in it, but the Good News is that I haven't given up on trying. Everyone has a light that needs to shine on the world, I just have to replace the batteries in mine from time to time.
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| Tourlitis Lighthouse (Greece), photo by Mary Kay |
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